This Hurts. Not Relaxing. And Everyone is a Liar.

If you follow me on Instagram you’ll know that I absolutely HATE acupuncture. Married to a medical doctor in conjunction with my incessant need for a quick fix, I value western medicine. Pills. Shots. You know… quick results. Anywho, since western medicine has been failing me this year I figured what the hell. I started my first dose of hell 6 weeks ago.

Acupuncture Round 1: This is not relaxing. Everyone is a liar. This hurts. I’m bored. 

Acupuncture Round 2: This is not relaxing. This doesn’t hurt as much as last time. I’m bored. Everyone is still a liar.

Acupuncture Round 3: This is the last time I’m doing this. A waste of money. Still not relaxing. Still hurts.

{A few days later…}

Clinic: Just calling to remind you of your appointment for Monday.

Me: Yeah… I can’t make it. I’ll have to reschedule (slash… never come again)

Ah-ha! I got ’em! I never have to do it again. #sneaky

Monday is finally here! I say finally because today is the day I go in for my baseline scan to begin my meds for my FET. I don’t have a menstrual cycle so I have the advantage of starting whenever. #BraggingPoints I decided today is the best day because it’ll work perfectly around my alcohol consumption schedule at a wedding this month. #Priorities #Cheers #DontHate

I went in for my ultrasound and Beth/my BFF/Ultrasound tech says:

“Now, what are you here for again?” She appears frightened as she’s looking at her monitor. Oh shit, what the hell is wrong now? 

 “I’m starting my birth control tonight for my FET.” I respond confidently.

 “Umm no you’re not. You have an 18mm follicle. You’re ovulating!” She says.

SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT. UP. 

Whhhhhhat? 

#ICantEven!
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{For those of you who don’t know: you usually ovulate when your follicle is size 20-26. They grow 1.5-2mm per day. I don’t do math but I know that means it’s happening soon.}

Later I get the call that my estrogen was well over 200 and this is for real. The doctor wants to do an IUI. #AllHandsOnDeck We call the pharmacy for a last minute trigger shot and away we go!

I went to the grocery store shortly after the call and it took every ounce in me to refrain from telling each person I crossed path with:

 I’M OVULATING!!! HUG ME!!! 

Am I absolutely bananas to think acupuncture could be responsible? I mean, I haven’t ovulated without the help of medical intervention since high school

{with the exception of January when I was taking a break after 3 failed IUI’s got my period for an HOUR. #Yup #YouReadThatRight}

But seriously, what do you think? 3 sessions and I ovulate?

Luck vs. Coincidence vs. Placebo Effect

#VsMagic

So this week: I triggered. We IUI’d. And I subjected myself to another painful round of acupuncture. Because I am now a believer. Let the 2 week wait commence!

And this is me.

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The End.

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3 thoughts on “This Hurts. Not Relaxing. And Everyone is a Liar.

  1. Yay!! I am so happy for you!! I have been doing acupuncture since end of June and I was a skeptic at first but I have seen and felt so many changes in my body since beginning that I am now a believer. Congratulations!!

    Like

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